Who’s this Spider-Man dude? And what does he want with my son?
Is your child forever coming home from kindergarten or school, suddenly a fan of some specific thing you’ve never heard of before? Comic book heroes, for instance? Here’s the tale of one boymom’s total overwhelm.
It’s as if it happened overnight. One day, monster trucks, police cars, the Paw Patrol critters and even unicorns were all the rage. Then, all of a sudden, my son’s life started revolving around Spider-Man, Batman, Captain America and Iron Man. He babbles on about them all day, throwing a tantrum whenever his Captain America underpants – his only item of clothing to be branded with this weird, slightly conceitedly named gentleman – are in the wash.
Come to think of it, it all started with these underpants – a gift from a friend whose son had outgrown them. I never thought my son would be interested in them. After all, on his fourth birthday in March, the gift table was populated solely with monster trucks, fire engines, police cars and Paw Patrol. Things that initially held his interest. But now, a few months on, he acts like it’s a veritable disgrace, an example of gross child endangerment, if he doesn’t have everything – from his underwear, to his bedsheets, to his toothbrush – plastered with these abstruse comic book heroes.
What can Spider-Man do anyway?
I don’t know where the hype comes from, nor do I know who these action heroes are. I am, after all, an absolute superhero noob. I mean, seriously, «Spider-Man»? What can he even do? Chat to spiders? And Iron Man? Let me guess. Instead of flesh and blood, he’s made of iron? I’ve never seen an action movie – and neither has my son, for that matter. As if that weren’t enough, every morning at kindergarten, kids come charging up to me from all directions to show me their outfits: «Look, I’ve got an Avengers T-shirt on today,» they say. «Oh, cool!» I reply, feigning enthusiasm. My fakery is rooted in the fact that I’m still wondering who these Avengers are and what they’ve done to my child. And what’s the difference between Marvel and The Avengers? Am I supposed to know that? Or even google it?
A 2015 study concluded that the amount of time kids spend watching TV is steadily increasing, and, in turn, their familiarity with comic book heroes. As a result, they’re more likely to want to wear clothes emblazoned with their favourite heroes.
My little one, however, has never watched action movies on TV. The simple reason being that he prefers watching Korean YouTube commercials, during which an excited child unboxes plastic cars and then plays with them. On a good day, he might watch Blippi, a YouTube star who makes educational videos for kids. He never wants to watch anything else – except at his Grandma’s, where, because she doesn’t have a smart TV, he might watch «Die Maus» or Paw Patrol.
What’s next?
Though I’m now a bit of a specialist when it comes to monster trucks and other cars, I just can’t get into superheroes. All the different names confuse me. I also don’t know if I can keep getting out of watching these films. Recently, I put on a Spotify audiobook for my son to fall asleep to and found it pretty scary. Thankfully, he seemed to find it so boring that he fell asleep right away.
When I ask other specialists i.e. of the parental variety, they report having similar experiences. A fellow superhero noob tells me that her son has recently started watching PJ Masks, despite never having encountered the animated series outside of playgroup. Through her, I also find out that it’s not the Spider-Man movies that are made for little boys his age, it’s a series called Spidey. Apparently, Spider-Man has a son who carries out his superhero duties on TV.
I want what my friends have
To me, one thing’s for certain: my child has clearly allowed himself to be influenced at kindergarten. I don’t know if his friends watch Spider-Man and his ilk on TV, or have jumped on the bandwagon another way. However, after doing a bit of searching on Galaxus, I know action hero products seem to be in high demand. I also know that it’s not a new phenomenon. The strategy has been working for years. As I discover through some research (in German), this is known as early brand loyalty. This is probably what will keep my son watching Spidey for now, ensure that he switches to Spiderman later, and soon get his little brother to emulate him.
So I can only hope this is a phase that’ll pass quickly. Mind you, the Peppa Pig phase (talking pigs, help!) also lasted longer than I would’ve liked, with my son’s fascination for it occasionally resurfacing.
There is, however, something good to come out of this whole saga. When his old love of cars was replaced with superheroes, it was finally (and I mean, finally!) accompanied by dinosaurs. Jurassic Park, to be exact. Now we’re talking! I’ve been buying toy dinosaurs since the pregnancy test came back positive, but until now, I’ve been left to play with his moving T-Rex on my own. Now, though, dinosaurs and Jurassic Park are cool, and I’m happy to deck out my son head to toe in clothes sporting these glorious species.
Even so, I’m dreading what might come next. Looking mistrustfully over at older boys, I’m shocked by the things I see on their T-shirts. Guardians of the Galaxy, Nintendo, Pokémon – all of which could be described as anything but cute. Where they’re concerned, I almost prefer Spider-Man.
Header image: Emmy Gaddy/Unsplash
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A true local journalist with a secret soft spot for German pop music. Mum of two boys, a dog and about 400 toy cars in all shapes and colours. I always enjoy travelling, reading and go to concerts, too.
