The art of the nap: the seven-minute nap is highly restorative, but needs to be learnt

You know the feeling: it's not even 12 noon and you're already completely exhausted. You pour coffee and Red Bull down your throat. After lunch, you're dog-tired again, and in the evening you literally collapse into bed, where you only recognise your partner's advances as a distant siren song.

Is life that exhausting? Are people that exhausting? Yes, they are too. But your problem is that you don't take naps. Let me show you the way to the wonderful world of naps. You'll no longer need coffee, you'll stroll through your day feeling fresh and you'll be able to set off philosophical and erotic fireworks in the evening.

The definition fallacy: How long does a nap last?

Now many people claim that they can't take a nap at all; they fall asleep for at least two hours and are even more exhausted afterwards than before. But only nap amateurs talk like that. A nap doesn't last two hours, otherwise the diminutive wouldn't fit at all, but between five and fifteen minutes. After that, your mind, exhausted by fruitless meetings and hollow chatter, is awake again and you wake up.

The trick is to use this awakening to get up and not to lie down. Otherwise, you'll actually drift off into the infamous hours-long daytime sleep that torments you with confused dreams.

It's quite simple: you lie down somewhere as soon as you feel the need, nod off, wake up after five to fifteen minutes and get up again. This can be done under your office desk on a yoga mat, on a park bench, in an armchair, on a sofa, even on an office chair with the backrest tilted. You just have to stick to one rule: Get up as soon as you wake up.

With time, you'll become a nap pro and know your perfect slots. For me, they are 9.30am, 1.30pm (which is compulsory for anyone over 40) and 6.30pm. I've even got to the point where I can take a nap on my parents' sofa while my son cheers, my dad is annoyed about Trump, my sister is annoyed about his voters and my mum shouts from the kitchen about who said what.

"How can you sleep with all this noise?" my sister asks after I sit up again, smiling blissfully.

"I've perfected the art of napping," I reply as my mum calls out from the kitchen what we were talking about, "I catch the right moment to start and the right moment to stop."

"Hm," my sister says thoughtfully. Her recovery method is to only wear something other than her pyjamas in emergencies. The coronavirus lockdown has really helped her in this respect. She now reports an almost intoxicating permanent Sunday morning feeling, but the side effects are fatal: she often asks about the day of the week because her body only knows this one day and laughs disparagingly if you want to do something with her on an actual Sunday morning. To me, the minute nap seems much more socially acceptable.

Sleepwear

Dagsmejan Balance Sleep Long Sleeve

S

9

Sleepwear

Dagsmejan Balance Sleep Long Sleeve

S

9

You can master the power nap too. Anyone can do it. Your mind really only needs very little time to regenerate and will automatically reactivate your body. You just need to trust them both. Wait until you are tired, roll out your yoga mat, lie down, close your eyes, let yourself sink into the floor and marvel at the clarity and strength you will be given in the minutes that follow. Rise up, roll the mat back up and complete your day in glorious freshness and finally in the arms of your partner.

Good mini night!