Bathrobe challenge, open piano, trust fall: do you dare to take on these tests of courage?

Being courageous: What does that actually mean? You've probably heard this quote: "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the realisation that something else is more important than fear." Many a contemporary person has put these words in their mouth (or done so themselves), and the wisdom also appeared in the modern Cinderella film version "Suddenly Princess".

Be courageous: With fear or without?

Almost 20 years later, Christopher Rate from Yale University analysed existing theories from psychology and philosophy in the "Journal of Positive Psychology".

In 2010, in a later article for the textbook "The Psychology of Courage", he defined courage as an act that consists of three components: The act must be intentional. In addition, a courageous act must be associated with risks, difficulties or dangers for the person or persons acting - and they must be aware of this risk. Thirdly, the goal must be "noble" or serve another "morally worthy purpose". A subjective feeling of fear can be involved, says Rate, but it is not mandatory.

One thing can be said with certainty: courage is highly individual. With or without the absence of fear. One person feels courageous when they finally manage to speak in front of large groups. Another is courageous when she dares to jump from the 10-metre board into the swimming pool. The third feels brave when he stops running away screaming from arachnids. And so on and so forth.

Becoming more courageous: Change is possible

One thing is certain: you can learn to be courageous. Every person's personality is not - as science has long assumed - fixed and unchangeable. On the contrary, we can mould our personality a little. Several studies, such as this longitudinal study, have shown that you and I and everyone else become more emotionally stable, more self-confident, more compatible and more conscientious as we approach adulthood. Without any conscious effort.

But can it also be done consciously and on purpose? A Zurich research team led by Mathias Allemand investigated the question in a large study involving more than 1,500 people: Can you influence the so-called Big Five of your personality?" The Big Five include the personality traits openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness and emotional stability. The participants tried to strengthen or weaken desired traits over a period of three months. The result: "Personality traits can be moulded over the course of a lifetime," says study leader Allemand.

Well, you won't be dancing on the tables at parties in the future if you're more of an introvert and prefer one-to-one small talk. But you can become a little more sociable, a little more outgoing. According to the researchers, one way to do this is to make resolutions that you formulate as concrete "if-then" sentences. Something like this: The next time I go to a party, the first person I'll approach at the buffet is someone I've never seen before.

If you want to become braver, you need to have confidence - in yourself and your own abilities, but also in those around you. Build up this confidence in small steps. If you want to try something new and brave, you don't have to attempt a bungee jump from a 100-metre-high bridge or jump into the lake to go ice swimming.

Begin with little courage challenges, for which I'll give you a few ideas now. And don't forget: "No one knows what he can do until he tries." Publilius Syrus, a Roman poet in the 1st century BC, was once convinced of this.

15 not-so-crazy ideas to copy

1. On YouTube, Instagram and TikTok, tests of courage are considered hard currency among children and young people. Not all social media challenges are useful, some are even life-threatening. Others, on the other hand, are demonstrating for a good cause, such as the Bathrobe Challenge of the German Dementia Aid on the occasion of World Alzheimer's Day on 21 September. Taking a little slice of such trends might even be fun for you. No, you don't need to post the selfie on social media. Print it out the old-fashioned way and hang it on your bathroom mirror. There it will remind you how brave you can be.
2. Everyone has dreams. Maybe you scroll through property adverts week after week, sighing as you look at pictures of luxury homes? That you'll never be able to afford? No more of that: Make an appointment with an estate agent, dress up in smart clothes - and take a look at some mega expensive flats/houses/lofts.
3. The older we get, the more stable our circle of friends. Usually. Why don't you stretch your courage muscle and invite someone you don't know to your next BFF dinner? You don't need to approach a stranger on the street. Or ask your Snapchat buddies who you're only friends with because of the algorithm. Ask your friends and family who they could bring along that you don't yet know in person.
4. It can also be brave to say no when everyone else in your peer group is saying "Go for it!" - Don't.
5. You can set up lots of courage challenges with strangers you see on the street: Smile at everyone you meet on the street/on the tram/at the till. Give him or her a compliment. Or strike up a conversation with strangers at the bus stop - making small talk is also courageous. A little chat with strangers makes you happy anyway, as science knows.

6. Are you afraid of the dark? Hate strange noises that you can't categorise? How brave to spend a night under the stars anyway. In the forest or by the lake, for example, if this is permitted in your canton (or federal state). Our colleague Olivia has turned this into a micro-adventure

   • but she "only" spent the night on her terrace with a fox and without a mobile

7. Do you feel like only the others have style? But maybe you still harbour the desire to be someone else, someone more stylish? Then head to the nearest second-hand shop and pick out a daring item of clothing. Take it to the office. Or just outside the door. Wallflowers were once upon a time.
8. Hobbies are one of those things that you either have or hate. Let's define "braver" in terms of the Big Five as "being more open" - and think about what you really dislike. Playing through the night on the Playstation with your nerd niece? Going fishing with your chatty uncle? Spending a day at the racecourse with your horse-loving neighbour? I bet there's someone around you who can help you stretch your personality a little.
9. This tip is not for people who are vegan or vegetarian: Offal is one of those meat specialities that I come across in every pub in my home country of Austria. I would never say it voluntarily. But maybe you would?
10. Alternatively, you could try bitter foods. Very healthy. Just the thought makes you gag? Come on, jump over your shadow and make a date with chicory, tarragon or Brussels sprouts. This cookbook will help.
11. Leaving your comfort zone can also be incredibly helpful when it comes to emotional issues. What topic is burning under your nails? Did a friend recently hurt you with a comment or embarrass you in front of others? Are you annoyed by the behaviour of one of your Family members - perhaps Grandma is always interfering in your child's upbringing? Or do you finally want to come out to your crush? Do it!
12. You've heard of free hugs, right? Sometimes you still see them since corona has been under control: people holding up signs in the pedestrian zone and calling for free hugs. Yes, cuddling makes you happy, but if that's too much for you with strangers, try the trust-fall instead. Stand on the street with your back to someone, let yourself fall backwards and he or she will catch you. As I said, courage requires trust - also in others.
13. Maybe you've just started exercising or are completely unathletic. It doesn't matter: book a lesson at your nearest gym and sit down on the scariest piece of sports equipment you come across. Ask how to use it before you start. After all, you want to keep your bones and ligaments healthy.
14. If you are one of those who learnt to play an instrument as a child: Hand on heart, when was the last time you played it? It must have been ages ago. Face your fear: get your chello/flute/tuba out again and make music in front of other people. The Open Piano campaign is also great: in Germany, Austria and Switzerland, the Organisation Open Piano for Refugees sets up freely accessible grand pianos where anyone who wants to can play. Dates are constantly updated online.
15. If you are still hesitating, just ask yourself one question: will you still be uncomfortable in one of these situations in a year's time? No. Then take the plunge and after you the deluge.

You just have to keep at it to become different - whether braver or more outgoing, more extroverted or more sociable. According to science, it takes an average of 66 days for a new behaviour to become a ritual. So put your inner bastard on a lead every now and then.